Dear Britney,

What happened to you? I watched your premiere last night, and I am saddened. You are completely insane, obsessed with being loved, and jesus, girl, you've gotten fat!

Kevin is a ghetto rat.... and you're on a downward spiral... You've lost your hair, Brit... and you showed it on national televison, please continue to have extensions if you're bald.. and go back to blonde. Oh, and please don't say on TV that your ideal man would be 'cool'.
Get a grip, honey.
Love,
Linds
ps. I hope you're pregnant because you were so bloated during the commentary and your boobs looked like over loaded water balloons.

pps. You're obviously a demon

That is some scary shit.
ppps. Please report to a trailer park immediately, put on your cutoffs with your pregnant stomach, crack open a PBR and light a Kool 100.